Introducing Miss Scarlet, Rusty, and Princess Persimmon

Ever since I found out last summer we were expecting another girl, I've been thinking that I really need to come up with some blog nicknames for my kids.

My nom de plume was chosen back several years ago when I joined the Babycenter.com website. I'd originally wanted "Cardinal Girl" after my college's mascot, but it was already taken so I settled on "Crimson Girl" in honor of the university where my DH was doing his graduate work at the time. I later changed it to "Crimson Wife" after I got accused of falsely pretending to be an alumna of that school during a BBS thread that got rather heated. I wasn't but decided to change my username just to clarify things.

When I started this blog, I decided to keep it anonymous to protect my family's privacy. Since I'd been using the CW username on Babycenter for so long, I thought it made sense to blog under the same one.

For my kids' noms de blog I've decided to stick with the shades of red theme. Perhaps a bit on the cutesy side but I really couldn't come up with anything I liked better.

My oldest is going to be Miss Scarlet. She shares a number of personality traits with Scarlett O'Hara- vivaciousness, stubbornness, spunkiness -so it seemed appropriate.

My DS is going to be Rusty. His hair is rust-colored plus he's really into mechanical stuff.

My new baby girl is going to be Princess Persimmon or Princess P for short. DH's nickname for her IRL is Princess Poop-n-stuff. But persimmon is so much nicer, don't you agree? The ancient Greeks considered it the "fruit of the gods".

Heart-Warming Link

Earlier this afternoon, the baby was asleep in my arms and I was sipping tea and flipping through this week's edition of the Archdiocese newspaper. I came across the following column by Ginny Kubitz Moyer (who blogs over at "Mary & Me"). Maybe it's just the wacky post-partum hormones, but it brought me to tears.

"it's not really the clothes I want to keep forever. It's this age, the beautiful baby months when Luke smiles his gummy smile, learns to hold his rattle, and laughs with the glee of the very new.

I love it, this sweet time when he fits perfectly against my shoulder, when his little body smells of warmth and sleep and babyhood.

No, I can't make the earth, or time, stand still.

But, like all moms, I'd give anything to try."

Beautiful!

We're Home!

Our new baby girl was born at 1:03 P.M. on Tuesday the 13th after a little less than 4 hours of labor. She weighed 6 lbs. 4 oz. and was 19" long.

I've Been Married a Decade Today...

DH and I are celebrating our 10th wedding anniversary today. Boy, does that make me feel OLD!

I know that rationally I shouldn't feel that way because we were practically babies by today's standards when we took the plunge (I was a month shy of my 22nd birthday and DH had just turned 23). But 10 years still seems like a fairly long time to be married!

Please Pray for Our Family

I've been having a kind of rough day today and could really use any moral support that you all could offer.

This morning I got a call from my mother-in-law that DH's grandmother passed away last night. She had been suffering from diabetes complications for a long time and was admitted to the hospital on Wednesday so it wasn't totally unexpected but we're still going to miss her.

Then at my OB appointment this afternoon, my doctor found that I'm measuring quite small for the baby's gestational age. Not only that, but the measurements hadn't changed at all since my last appointment a month ago. So she has referred me for an ultrasound to make sure that the baby and placenta look okay. Unfortunately, the first opening the clinic has is not until Tuesday afternoon :-(

The good news is that the baby's heartbeat sounded strong and she's been moving about quite a bit. Also, my DS also measured very small for his gestational age and was only 5 lbs. 12 oz. at his full-term birth. He's still a little peanut (almost 3 but is the size of a typical 18 month old). Our pediatrician has run a bunch of tests on him & has not found any medical problems. As she has reassured me, "Somebody's got to be in that below-the-3rd percentile on the growth curve." So hopefully that's the case with this new baby, too. I just wish that I didn't have to wait 4 days to have the ultrasound.

Sorry to ramble on, but I just wanted to ask you to please keep our family in your prayers :-)

StoryCorps Project Coming to S.F.!

I don't know about you, but I'm a big fan of the Friday segments on National Public Radio's "Morning Edition" program featuring personal vignettes from everyday Americans recorded as part of the StoryCorps oral history project. If you're unfamiliar with these, you can listen to a sample of them here.

I was very excited, therefore, to learn that the recently opened Contemporary Jewish Museum here in San Francisco has been selected as the very first museum in the U.S. to host a StoryCorps recording booth. On Thursdays and Sundays from October 12, 2008 through October 11, 2009, the StoryCorps project will be offering appointments for recording sessions to visitors. For more info, click here.

My mom's coming to visit in January to help out after the arrival of our new baby. I'm probably not going to feel up to participating in the project myself but I'd love to get the chance for my mom and my uncle to reminisce about my late grandmother, who was quite a remarkable woman :-)

Happy News!

As you've probably noticed, I haven't been blogging much in the past 6 or so weeks. I've had a very good reason for this, which I can now reveal- I'm expecting baby #3 in January!

Hopefully I've turned a corner with my morning sickness now that I'm entering my 2nd trimester and will feel up to resuming regular blogging soon :-)

Charity Begins at Home

Isn't it a wonderful feeling when one gets confirmation that the lessons one is trying to teach one's children don't just go in one ear and out the other?

After Mass, our parish offers coffee & donuts in the community center as a way of encouraging fellowship among parishioners. As a privilege, my children get to have a donut assuming they've behaved themselves during Mass. It's not an explicit bribe, but they do know that we go home straight after Mass without getting one when they are naughty. The Alfie Kohns of the world may object to this practice, but it really does work!

Anyways, we had to get home because DH was going to a networking brunch with a grad school classmate so we took the donuts with us out to the car rather than staying to socialize. I put DS' on top of the bulletin on the car roof while I was getting him into his car seat. A big gust of wind blew them onto the ground. Being 20 mos, he immediately started howling. DD (age 4 3/4) saw that he was upset at the loss of his donut and without anyone prompting her to, offered him the rest of hers! :-)

I was so proud of her for doing this! In our homeschooling, I talk a lot about Christ's teaching us to love one another as He loves us. I try to model kindness and empathy for our children, though being human it can be hard at times. I felt so grateful that God allowed me to see that my efforts are indeed making a difference in my children's lives :-)

Good News Regarding my Cousin's Baby Girl

My mom just told me that the doctors have been able to drain the excess fluid from my cousin's daughter. She is also now breathing on her own, praise the Lord!

My cousin and his wife have decided to name her Haley Josephine.

I pray that baby Haley's condition will continue to improve. I know that God won't give my cousin and his wife anything they cannot handle but I pray that it is His will for little Haley to live :-)

Brains & Brawn or How I Fell for DH

So, the theme of this week's Crazy Hip Blog Mama carnival #32 is "How You Met Your Spouse/Partner". Problem is, I don't have a cute "girl meets boy" story.

I met DH during college orientation week at a Jell-O shot party hosted by his fraternity. Not exactly the most auspicious venue for meeting one's future spouse! DH asked me to dance, we hung out at the party (no, I did NOT "hook up" with him afterwards!) & he invited me to the campus coffee house the next evening. We've been together ever since- 8 1/2 years married and 12 years total come September.

Headmistress over at "The Common Room" had an interesting post in this week's edition of the Carnival of Homeschooling called "People, Events, or Ideas". In it, she compares the interests of her oldest DD's college classmates with those of their homeschooled friends. "College was a bit of culture shock [to her DD] because so much of it was so shallow" she writes. "Far from being exposed to a new and wider range of interesting ideas and conversations, she learned that most of her classmates typically preferred to hold discussions centering around

• Who is cute
• Clothes
• Who is really cute
• Sports
• Who is cuter
• Rock groups, especially who is the cutest member of the band
• Country music (different set of friends), especially who is the cutest
• Movies, primarily regarding who is the best looking actor in the movie
• Shopping at the mall, especially cool if you see somebody cute
• Television shows, especially who is really cute

Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against sports or Country music (I'm a big fan of both). There's nothing wrong with a bit of entertainment in one's life, so long as it's reasonably wholesome. The problem comes when the person is solely interested in trivial things and lacks depth.

One of the things that attracted me to DH was that he wasn't afraid to discuss meaningful issues including "hot button" political & theological ones on our first date. Too many of our peers, even at the "elite" university we attended, were mainly interested in superficial stuff such as drinking, drug-taking (which neither of us did), casual sex (ditto), and material success. I liked having somebody to talk to about more important topics even if we did not always see eye-to-eye. I also appreciated that he wanted a thinking woman and was not intimidated by my brains & strong opinions.

Of course, I also appreciated the fact that he's really cute and has a passing resemblance to Matt Damon (hey, I'm a red-blooded heterosexual female!)

Urgent Prayer Request for My Cousin's Baby

I got a call this morning that my cousin's wife went into labor last night. The doctors delivered the baby via emergency c-section. The good news is that the baby does NOT have Trisomy 13 and that she has survived the night! The doctors still do not know what was causing all the excess fluid but they are somewhat more optimistic than they had been. The baby is in the neonatal ICU and the situation is still very grave.

My cousin and his wife have not yet named the baby & I'm not sure anyone has broached the subject of baptism with them.

Please keep the baby in your prayers!

I found a nice "Prayer for a Premature Baby" at the Our Kids website:

God bless the little child behind the plastic wall
For all she knows is the ringing of the bells and the blurred images around her.
She has been taken from the womb without warning and I long to hold her in my arms.

Lord, I ask in your name that this child be healed.
I am willing to accept your decision no matter what it will be.
I am willing to take on the responsibilities for caring for this child.
I am willing to give this child love and understanding no matter the cost.

Please Lord help me to accept reality and what has happened without explanation or warning. Help me face the fact that this is no one's fault and that I was given a special task to complete here on Earth.
God give this child the strength to make it through another second, minute, hour and day as each moment is a blessing and a triumph from Heaven.

God, may you give the strength and compassion to the caregivers and nurses that take care of this child.
May you keep this child protected and free from all injury and pain.

As you see dear Lord, I am at your mercy for the life of this child.
Please leave her here on Earth and know that I will provide all the love and understanding that this child needs.
I accept the challenge and will be your humble servant dear Lord.

Prayer Request Update

I got an update from my aunt yesterday about my cousin's baby and tragically the news is not good. The excess amniotic fluid is now on the baby's brain and there is little hope of survival. The doctors suspect that it's due to a chromosomal defect called Trisomy 13 & they are going to do an amniocentesis today to confirm. Although a small percentage of children born with Trisomy 13 do survive, in this case the defects are so extensive that they are almost certainly incompatible with life. If the amnio confirms the suspected diagnosis, the doctors are planning to deliver the baby on Thursday. The hospital would provide palliative care to make her as comfortable as possible during her brief time here on Earth (most likely a matter of minutes) but would not take any aggressive measures to prolong her life.

Please keep my cousin, his wife, and their baby girl in your prayers during this very difficult time!

Happy Mother's Day and Urgent Prayer Request

Happy Mother's Day to all the moms, grandmoms, and great-grandmoms out there! Motherhood is challenging and not very glamorous but few vocations have so great an impact on others. May God bless all the women out there who have accepted His call to become mothers!

On a sad note, I learned yesterday that my cousin's wife was rushed to the hospital on Thursday. She is expecting her second daughter in July and the doctors have discovered abnormal fluid in the baby's lungs :-( According to my dad, they aren't sure yet what is causing the fluid on the lungs but there's high probability it will result in severe complications or even death. It's too early for the doctors to induce labor but trying to treat it in utero is risky too. There's only a 1% chance that the baby will be born healthy.

I can't even begin to imagine what my cousin and his wife must be going through right now! Their oldest is nineteen months and my uncle by marriage (my cousin's stepdad) has been going through chemotherapy for stomach cancer so they had a lot on their plates to deal with even before this latest crisis.

Please say a prayer to St. Bernardine of Siena, the patron saint of lungs/respiratory issues, for his intercession upon the behalf of my cousin's baby. May God watch over her and may He help my cousin and his wife cope with the challenges they face.

I found a nice prayer for healing on the "Our Catholic Faith" website: Lord, You invite all who are burdened to come to You. Allow your healing hand to heal "Baby D". Touch her soul with Your compassion for others. Touch her heart with Your courage and infinite love for all. Touch her mind with Your wisdom, that her mouth may always proclaim Your praise. Teach her to reach out to You in her need, and help her to lead others to You by her example. Most loving Heart of Jesus, bring her health in body and spirit that she may serve You with all her strength. Touch gently this life which You have created, now and forever. Amen.

Baby Number 17 for the Duggars!

Less than 2 years after the birth of #16 Johanna Faith, Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar are expecting #17 Jennifer Danielle. I can't even begin to imagine what it would be like to have 17 kids in 19 years!

Of course children are indeed blessings from God. I definitely believe married people ought to be "open to life" as the Church teaches. Still, I question the Protestant "quiverfull" movement since it seems like it can be pretty misogynistic at times. Mary Pride was quoted in a Newsweek article bashing Natural Family Planning as unnaturally denying sex to the husband. That kind of attitude is pretty degrading towards women IMHO. It isn't all about the husband's lust without regard for the best interests of the wife and the family as a whole. The whole point of NFP is for the husband AND the wife to prayerfully consider TOGETHER whether to try to conceive, try to avoid pregnancy, or something in between.

Women are more than just a womb and responsible parenthood can mean there are sometimes very legitimate reasons to postpone pregnancy. God made women only fertile for 1/3 of their cycle and to have recognizable fertility signals to predict with 98-99% accuracy when that is. Why would He do that if it were never morally permissible to use NFP for any reason whatsoever?

Large families are wonderful if personal circumstances allow for it. Too many people in our society limit family size for purely selfish reasons. However, having a "welcoming heart" towards children does not automatically mean "have as many babies as you physically can".


UPDATE: Jennifer Danielle was born on August 2, 2007 at 10:01 A.M.

Introducing Our Family

"Lo, children are a heritage of the Lord; and the fruit of the womb is His reward" -Psalm 127:3

We have been blessed with two beautiful children so far- a daughter who is almost 4 1/2 and a son who is 16 months. Our little girl is inquisitive, bubbly, high energy, and very outgoing. We are currently doing a gentle prep year with her and will start formal kindergarten in the fall. Her strengths are in reading, biology, athletics, and social interaction. Our little boy is methodical, persistent, mellow, and somewhat shy. As far as one can tell at such an early age, his strength seems to be in the visio-spatial domain. He loves playing with blocks, Legos, and the shape sorter and is much more advanced in using them than his big sister was at the same age. It's amazing to see how different their personalities are!

"For this cause shall a man leave father and mother and shall cleave to his wife, and they two shall be in one flesh. Therefore now they are not two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no one put asunder." - Matthew 19:5-6

DH and I have been together 11 1/2 years and married for 8. We both grew up in the Northeast- him in a suburb of Philadelphia and me in a suburb of Boston. We attended the same college in California and met during my freshman orientation week when he was a sophomore. He proposed shortly before he graduated, and we married two weeks after I graduated the following December. He then served 5 years as a military officer before leaving in 2003 to attend graduate school. He graduated in June 2006 and took a job in the San Francisco Bay Area. I am very grateful for how hard he works to support our family and allow us to homeschool :-)